Hi Beauties! This post is a little different from anything I've ever done here. . For my own personal reasons I needed to get my thoughts down and out of my head. For those that know me personally know I'm not one to really express my feelings too much. It's the Capricorn in me. I very rarely open up, and when I do it's to very few people. . but my blog is somewhat therapeutic for me because it allows me to express myself through everything that I love and Jayona was one of my blog's biggest supporters. So this post is dedicated to her, my sister.
February 16, 2017
My life changed forever.
At 25 years old this is truly the first time I've had to deal with losing someone so close to me. I didn't and honestly, I still don't know how to quite handle this. It's not a day that goes by that I don't think about her or have the urge to pick up the phone and FaceTime her. FaceTime was our thing. With me living so far away in New York that was our way of always communicating with each other atleast once a week because she already knew how much I hate texting lol. . So with that said, the fact that today marks a month since her passing and I can't make that call it's starting to hit me and it hurts.
8 years ago Jayona came into my life full force, at the perfect timing and I made sure to hold onto her. I have always been very particular about the people and the energy that I keep around me. The moment our friendship begin to grow I knew she was a real one. Almost instantly she became a part of the Pendergrass family. She was at my house so much she basically became my parents' second daughter. Every birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, random party I threw, road trip - you name it she was there.
She was my voice of reason whenever I needed her. It was like she always knew exactly what to say. Our friendship was one where we gave it to each other straight. No sugar coating anything. Tell it like it is, for what it is type of relationship and that's what we appreciated most about each other.
January 10th, my 25th birthday was the last time I physically saw my sister and was able to give her a hug and tell her I love her. What I would do to just have one last conversation with her. I would just want to let her know how much I love and appreciate her being the friend and sister she was in my life.
I firmly believe that with every event that happens in your life, whether good or bad, there's a lesson within it. What this unfortunate event has taught me is to cherish each and every moment you have with the ones you love and care about because you honestly never know when it will be the last time you will see or speak with them. Specifically, myself. Living so far away from my family and friends, this has become a priority to me now. We tend to allow ourselves to get caught up in the busy-ness of our own day-to- day lives, it can become hard to make sure you're 'keeping in touch' with everyone. I honestly believe this was God's way of completely s l o w i n g m e d o w n. Slowing me down to appreciate every moment that I have on this earth. Luckily, I've been blessed with "low-maintenance" friends. Which means we don't have to talk every single day to maintain our friendship. As you get older it becomes hard to even do that. I've always had the "pick right up where we left off" friendships. However, I have made more of an effort to do a "check up" on the ones I love. Whether its just sending a random "I love you girls" in the group chat or a random "I just needed to hear your voice" call to my brother. I want to always make sure that everyone in my life knows how important they are to me.
With losing one sister, it has without a doubt brought me closer to my other sisters. If it was't for these ladies the last month would have been 10 times harder than it already has been. The only way we're making it through this is together. We've lost a huge piece of our puzzle, so sticking together through it is the only way. So I thank all my sisters for being the strong women you all are. I love you all.
In loving memory of my best friend, my sister, Jayona - I love you forever & always!
She was my voice of reason whenever I needed her. It was like she always knew exactly what to say. Our friendship was one where we gave it to each other straight. No sugar coating anything. Tell it like it is, for what it is type of relationship and that's what we appreciated most about each other.
January 10th, my 25th birthday was the last time I physically saw my sister and was able to give her a hug and tell her I love her. What I would do to just have one last conversation with her. I would just want to let her know how much I love and appreciate her being the friend and sister she was in my life.
I firmly believe that with every event that happens in your life, whether good or bad, there's a lesson within it. What this unfortunate event has taught me is to cherish each and every moment you have with the ones you love and care about because you honestly never know when it will be the last time you will see or speak with them. Specifically, myself. Living so far away from my family and friends, this has become a priority to me now. We tend to allow ourselves to get caught up in the busy-ness of our own day-to- day lives, it can become hard to make sure you're 'keeping in touch' with everyone. I honestly believe this was God's way of completely s l o w i n g m e d o w n. Slowing me down to appreciate every moment that I have on this earth. Luckily, I've been blessed with "low-maintenance" friends. Which means we don't have to talk every single day to maintain our friendship. As you get older it becomes hard to even do that. I've always had the "pick right up where we left off" friendships. However, I have made more of an effort to do a "check up" on the ones I love. Whether its just sending a random "I love you girls" in the group chat or a random "I just needed to hear your voice" call to my brother. I want to always make sure that everyone in my life knows how important they are to me.
I have so many memories over the years with Jayona, its hard to grasp the fact that she isn't here to make anymore with me. Yet, her amazing spirit and every moment we shared will stay with me forever. She was such a joy to anyone she ever came in contact with. You couldn't help but love her!
In loving memory of my best friend, my sister, Jayona - I love you forever & always!
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